World's Worst Singer - to the theme of Hymns and Arias!

Keith's Billy Crystal-esque opening moment!

Well good afternoon to friends, family and people we have just met
Our aim today is to raise lots of funds and leave you all in debt
Its all to build a lovely pool in the big Heath Hospital
So the little kids can have a swim, they'll all be soaking wet.

And we are raising lots of money, let's hope the next verse, starts to get funny

Here we are in Ystradowen, for jazz and a spot of tea
If Clare Gob hasn't told you yet, she's selling gas and electricity
For those of you wondering , just what is happening
Just stick a pound in this glass and I will stop my singing

And we are raising, lots of money, let's hope the next verse, starts to get funny

If you like an auction, then flog it is your call
On the astroturf there's football and your drawings are on the wall
It'll be eyes down for the bingo 'til you have to shout full house
Celebrating ladies please, remember keep on your blouse!

And we are raising, lots of money, let's hope the next verse, starts to get funny

We have raffles, games, an auction, we have sports and even quizzes
Last prize in the raffle is an evening with my missus
So come on good folks lets all dig deep and empty all your pockets
Fill up this glass with one pound coins and I promise I will stop it

And we are raising, lots of money, let's hope the next verse, starts to get funny

So thank you all for coming and making it such fun
Today is surely special for each and everyone
We hope that you all leave here with happy memories
But it's not over stay right here, have another cup of tea!

And we are raising, lots of money, you're right the last verse, just was not funny!

Speeches from 30 June 2013 - Vote of thanks

A big thank you to our kitchen staff today - in charge of the kitchen  - Julie and Mike, with their helpers Barbara and Diana.  They have been working so hard today preparing the food and will be doing the washing up later, so a big round of applause for them please.  Also thanks to Julie, Mike, Marilyn, Byron, Pam and Gareth for being here so late last night helping us to set up.

Thank you to our MC & games master Keith and Games Mistress Lucy.  Well done - they are doing a great job as always!

Unfortunately, Cliff is unable to be with us today, but thank you Barbara for being a big part of the entertainment here today with their very own version of 'Flog It' and helping us to raise funds for Splish Splash Splosh. I'm sure there is room for a slot on daytime TV!

Thank you to Abercynon Gardening Club and friends Sue & Colin from Mountain Ash for their donation of plants for the Gardening Stall.

Thanks to all the many crafters who have been working away for months to supply the craft stall. Family members like Rudy's great grandmother Hetty, still knitting at 92, her friend Betty, Lynda and daughter Clare in Australia and other daughter Laura, Marilyn, Avril, Hannah, Katie & then also family friends and neighbours - Marion and Norma from Abercynon, Pam Lloyd from Tonteg, Wendy from Ogmore Vale Bakery and her brother Michael, Nick's mother Julia from Hertfordshire for her homemade jams.  Also artists Alison Fennel, Huw Aaron and Luned Aaron for their generous donations and Byron for his cards.  I hope I haven't left anyone out! Many thanks to you all, it is much appreciated.

Many thanks to Hannah for organising the home and garden emporium - I know it's been a lot of hard work and also for baking all the delicious loaves of cake, which we are enjoying for our tea today. The chocolate cakes are just amazing!

Thank you to Byron for being our photographer today - we hope to make a DVD for the event and you will be able to get a copy in a few weeks time.

Thanks to Nick for doing the very important job of being our cashier today.

Thank you to President Norma Nesling from Inner Wheel and incoming President Victor Nesling  from Aberdare Rotary Club for being here today and for making their incredibly generous donations.

Thank you to the many people who couldn't make it today, but have made very generous donations to the event.  Also thanks to the many celebrities who have contributed to the raffle and the auction.

Thank you to Mike for his contribution of excellent ice-cream and to Julie for her donation of Welsh cakes and jam for tea today and to both of them for their invaluable help over the last few weeks.  Much appreciated!

Thanks to Katie for all her hard work over the past 4 months organising this event - a lot of time and effort has gone into the logistics & paperwork which are necessary to make a large event like this possible.

A very big thank you in advance to Clare Hingott and the Graham Watkins Trio who will be performing for us later and have waived their fee for such a good cause.  I know that a lot of people here are fans of the band and have seen them at their concerts at St Donats. I know that you are all going to enjoy listening to them later - and dancing too, if you feel so inclined!

Finally, thank you to all of you who have bought tickets and come along today to help make this event a big success.  We have been overwhelmed by the response, selling all the tickets with no problem at all and in fact, having a waiting list!  I assure you that this is much appreciated by the family and friends of Rudy Cole.

Now, a big round of applause for Amy & Matt, two of the bravest people I know and of course baby Rudy.  We are all supporting you in our own ways and will always continue to do so for as long as needed.

Avril Vokes